Book Review: Immortal Pleasures by V. Castro

 

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Thank you to NetGalley and Random House for allowing me to read this ARC!

Content Warning: racism, murder, death, colonialism, sexual assault/rape, misogyny,

Malinalli is known the world over as La Malinche: a traitor, the Nahua woman who helped Hernán Cortés colonize and, ultimately, destroy her own people. But what they don't know is that after Cortés was done with her usefulness, Malinalli was turned into an immortal blood drinker -- a vampire. Searching for purpose, Malinalli has made a name for herself by reclaiming the stolen artifacts and treasures of her people, carelessly observed in museums around the world, hoping to heal the broken heart that has plagued her century after century. What she longs for most is someone to understand her, to embrace both her human side and her dark, vampiric nature. When she arrives in Dublin, eager to retrieve two Aztec skulls that are tied intimately with her past, she meets a mortal who manages to capture her interest. But this mortal is not the only one who snakes his way into her life, and as Malinalli learns to embrace her desires and recuperate from the traumas of her human life, she will be pushed to the limits of what she understands of vampirism and the human will to overcome. 

Before I'd even finished reading Immortal Pleasures, I knew that this was going to be a difficult review to write. While this is certainly a unique experience, unlike anything I've read before, structurally and narratively speaking, it's simply not a very good book. It's hard to write that, as I try to be as fair as possible when writing these reviews -- as someone who writes myself, I know how painful the criticism can be. I'm not saying I didn't enjoy reading this, because I very much did, but man, is it corny and sometimes way, way too over the top.

Now, I don't mind some corniness in my vampire media, but this was to the point that it was taking all of my self-control not to cringe during certain passages. Sadly, the writing doesn't come off as very polished either, and although Malinalli is such a fascinating figure in history, rife with so much misunderstanding, I found that Castro never quite managed to make her feel believable, either as a human being or a creature of the night. Her character development is as equally cheesy as the rest of the story, and all of it somehow feels extremely juvenile, in spite of the very dark and sometimes disturbing content matter. Malinalli reads very much like a teenager, and although I could buy that this comes from her traumatic past starting at such a young age, it's been hundreds of years at this point, and I would expect at least some maturation in her character.

The rest of the characters suffer from similar problems, and I found both of her lovers, Colin and Alexander, to be a little laughable in their dialogue and characterization. In fact, all of the dialogue comes across as being wooden and stiff, as if they are in a Shakespearean play, reading off of a piece of paper. Much of it feels very much like telling us rather than showing us, and I was surprised by how little we actually get to experience of Malinalli's human life. I expected much more of it, since it's so rich for reimagining in a tale like this.

Onto the fun stuff, though: this is one hell of a ride, and I can't fault it for its constant breakneck pace, the way it relentlessly doles out blood and sex. I truly cannot describe to you how unintentionally hilarious the sex scenes are; there are many other reviews with quotes from the book, and I encourage you to read those if you're having a bad day. I'm not saying this to be cruel or mean, but man, some of those lines are truly hilarious zingers.

In the end, this simply wasn't the book for me. As I always say, I'm sure there will be plenty of people out there who enjoy Immortal Pleasures, but for me, this just didn't quite hit the mark.